Roselyn’s Rules: Things I’ve Learned from Other People’s Relationships

1. If you’re in love with someone, don’t settle for someone else.

This may seem like common sense but it’s surprising how many people I know who’ve done this. If you’re in love with someone and for whatever reason can’t be with them, it’s the worst thing in the world to start a relationship with someone you treat like a consolation prize.

Not only is it unfair to have your cake and eat it too, but you’re just making your own life more complicated. The best case scenario would be that one day, your dream guy or girl would finally be available and all you’d have to do if break up with your replacement girlfriend or boyfriend.

That story is something that Ted Mosby would tell his fictional kids in “How I Met Your Mother”. But for normal people, that’s one story the grand-kids don’t need to hear.

2. Make a good impression on your significant others’ friends. It makes a difference. 

Barring meeting the parents, introducing your friends to your boyfriend is a big deal. Your friends are the family you choose and more than that, they can serve as an early warning system to detect any red flags that you might miss.

Going down in history as the girlfriend whom nobody liked doesn’t help you in maintaining a long and healthy relationship. So when you and your boo are Facebook official, make it a point to meet his friends. Remember their names and make sure you to get know them.

After all, when your boyfriend or girlfriend isn’t with you, there’s a good chance he or she is with them. But most importantly, nobody likes a Yoko.

3. Don’t make being in a relationship central to your identity

Everyone has that friend who always seems to be off the market. In my case that girl is usually my best friend.

While being a serial monogamist seems great on paper; you always have someone to take to weddings, Valentine’s Day must be great, you can drink one milkshake with two straws, etc.

But great as all that is, no girl should feel like she needs the validation of having a boyfriend or a girlfriend to feel confident. Your identity is just that, yours.

So take a sabattical from heartbreaking and actually think about what you want to do. It also gives you an excuse to watch all your favorite terrible movies, listen to your favorite music and to lounge around with unwashed hair without fear of reproach.

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